Let me extrapolate

jeffrey has left a new comment on your post "Ok, Ok...what about the Fed?":

I don't understand. Are you talking about a Hurricane evacuation plan? Because I guess we're just going with what we've been going with in that regard. What is it about the spill that should make the process any different?

 Ok, here are some questions off the top of my head:

1. In the event of a hurricane which drives a high tidal surge that could affect a VERY large swath of coastal real estate, how does that affect us?  We could be looking at a toxic tidal surge...what happens now? 

2.  Under that scenario, if there are massive areas which will be evacuated, have they planned for that in terms of evacuation routes?  What if they require an evacuation from Pensacola to New Orleans?  If they don't make that decision well ahead of time...can you imagine the cluster fuck we're going to see occur on southern interstates?

3.  Are they taking that clusterfuck scenario into account when they pull the trigger on evacuation plans?  Does that mean the decision to evacuate will be on a hair trigger, or will they be much more conservative in their decision to pull the trigger?

4.  If we are hit with even a minor hurricane and we get hit with toxic sludge, even in a minor way (Allah forbid it pushes it's way into Pontchartrain or even into our water supply in the Mississippi) how is that going to affect the length of time in which we are allowed to come back into the city?  Are we looking at a potential "indefinite" evacuation?

If that's the case, they should tell us that is a possibility now, so we can plan on it.

If I'm running a business, and I am evacuated thinking I'm going to get right back into the city after the threat....I need to be told that you may end up in a Katrina situation and not be able to get back into the city for months.

While New Orleanians are more aware of that possibility, I doubt Mobile, Pensacola, Tampa,  considered that reality.

My overall point is that the fear mongering on hurricane + oil, is only going to build and build....i.e., the Huff & Puff Post is building the doomsday scenarios on a daily basis.

Everyone seems to be focusing on plugging the well....I hope that happens soon, but that's completely in BP's hands.

Evacuation plans are in our government's hands.  Let' s hope they have a plan.

Ok, Ok...what about the Fed?

BP didn't consider hurricanes in its response plan

Let's hope DHS hasn't turned emergency preparedness and disaster response over to BP as well.

I am begging some all powerful MSM entity to press all disaster response organizations, from the top down, on what their evacuations plans are for N.O. and the Gulf Coast and if an evacuation would be extended because of the oil spill.  If that's a possibility, we need to know in order to plan for it.  

Am I the only worried about this?  I'll shut up if it's just me.  I'll shut up and load up a U-haul, but I'll shut up.

UPDATE:  What Hurricanes?

What is the evacuation plan?

Nobody knows.  That's pretty scary.  In the event of a "signifcant" tropical storm +, what is the game plan for the city, and Gulf Coast region in general?

I guess what I'm asking is hurricane + oil = ????

There are rumors flying around on the internet, which need to be either dispelled or confirmed.  I don't see our city, state, or federal entities coming to the forefront to let us know what the plan is.

Joel Achenbach, from the Washington Post, was kind enough to reply to me in response to the article he recently posted in which financial anaylst and oil "insider", Matt Simmons, claimed the entire Gulf Coast will be evacuated.  Achenbach pointed out the subtle snark he made towards Simmons, referring to him as "a font of apocalyptic predictions".  He stressed that readers would be able to discern that Simmons was making an egregious claim.

Unfortunately that quote made it around to numerous conspiracy sites and the notion of a mandatory Gulf Coast evacuation seems to be very real in lots of folks' minds.

After pointing that out to Achenbach, he seemed to appreciate the need for us, the people along the Gulf Coast, to get answers from those who will decide our fate in the event of a tropical storm. I am hoping that the WaPo will find answers for us soon from DHS, and the state entities who are responsible for evacuation procedures.

Knowing the Truth Timely

I have a real fascination with communist propaganda.  That doesn't mean I am a communist, I just love the artwork, diatribes, and symbolism.

Kim Jong-Il is a master.  I have this series of Rockwellesque paintings I pulled off the web where he is depicted in different settings around the country doing everything from showing chemists how to mix, to showing schoolboys how to shoot guns....here's an example.  He has a whole county bluffed into believing he's a super hero.  The head coach of the NK men's soccer team recently stated that Jong-Il had personally developed "invisible cell phones".  Awesome...fuckin' eh.  Can you imagine telling a country of 24 million people whatever you want and they all believe it?  I'm actually amazed that Jong-Il has maintained his grasp on reality as well as he has for this long.

I just found this recent dispcatch from Comrade Fidel.

KNOWING THE TRUTH TIMELY

He bizarrely suggests that the World Cup is dictating the timeline for Obama's decision to launch WWIII, by blockading and searching merchant ships headed for Iran.  Then he finishes the diatribe with this sentiment:

"We don’t know which will be the effect on the environment of the nuclear weapons that will unavoidably explode in various parts of the world, and that in the least serious variant will happen in abundance.  

As for me, to advance a hypothesis would be pure science fiction."

That's good stuff.  He advanced a theory that the World Cup is somehow dictating Obama's decision to launch a nuclear war that would wipe out the developed world, but he refrains from speculating on the horror of how a nuclear fallout of that war would affect the environment...the thought is just too harrowing for him.

I think if Fidel was an American he would be a commentator on Mad Money with Jim Cramer...or better yet he would have his own show.

You have to understand that Fidel has been spewing insane rants for the past 50 years.  The Cuban culture has been inundated with his neurosis on a daily basis for that entire period, without having the option to "turn it off".  Imagine being forced to listen to Glen Beck every day of your life, by penalty of death or imprisonment.....that's what Cubans have endured for decades.  Although I'm being a little tough on Castro by comparing him to Beck.

When I was in Cuba in 2001, we visited a Cuban artist, whose star was rising, in his apartment in Old Havana.  He had a small black and white TV with rabbit ear antennae wrapped in tin foil in his living room (also his bedroom).  He had one channel, the "state" channel which pretty much consisted solely of Fidel's rants packaged in different ways...talk shows, speeches, analysts, news, etc.

While everyone else was looking at his artwork, I was fascinated with his TV.  The guy had curiously drilled a bright, yellow piece of thick, hard, plastic over the screen of the TV.

The show that was airing was a round table discussion with Fidel as a guest.  I couldn't take my eyes off it.

He noticed my fascination with it, and asked me, in broken English, if I liked it.  I smiled, shook my head and said, "Si, it's like a filter..filtrarse."  He smiled back and replied, "It's the only way I can stand to watch it."  We smiled at each other for what seemed like an eternity.

My mind was trying to find some functional purpose to the yellow filter.  In truth timely, it was an expression of rebellion...and a very crafty one at that.

Lately, I've been thinking about drilling a yellow, plastic filter on my TV.

Just felt like sharing that moment.

Evacuate the Entire Gulf?

I'm getting very frustrated trying to not only disseminate fact from fiction during this crisis, but dispel fear mongering perpetuated by supposedly reputed national news sources.

The Huffington Post picked up an idiotic YouTube video claiming it was raining oil in the city;  it spread like wildfire across the country and even went viral, internationally.  Since then, none of the web entities who posted that nonsense have come forward with a story admitting the claim was crap.  The Drudge Report just pulled the story down as if it never existed, without informing their readers it was false.

Now I run across this Washington Post article where Joel Achenbach prints a quote from oil trading financial analyst, Matt Simmons as if he is an authority on emergency procedures:

"We're going to have to evacuate the gulf states," said Matt Simmons, founder of Simmons and Co., an oil investment firm and, since the April 20 blowout, the unflagging source of end-of-the-world predictions. "Can you imagine evacuating 20 million people? . . . This story is 80 times worse than I thought." 

No shit?  And how is that a financial trader who is known for promoting the highly contended notion of "Peak Oil" (basically states the planet's oil needs have now surpassed it's capacity) knows what the emergency preparedness plan is for the entire Gulf Coast?  If the story is "80 times worse" than he thought, I'd like to know who wrote that story for him and informed him of DHS's game plan.  If the WaPo is breaking this news via a financial oil trader, buried seven paragraphs into the story, I'm not only questioning their integrity I'm questioning their business acumen.  If this claim is true, it should be a headline on every news resource on the planet and the WaPo may have just landed the scoop of the century.

To make matters worse the very next paragraph quotes Coast Guard Admiral, and point man for the disaster, Thad Allen, talking about the integrity of the wellhead.  Achenbach just prints the entire Gulf Coast will have to be evacuated in the wake of a tropical event, then instead of confirming that claim with Allen, he shifts the story to the integrity of the wellhead and the efforts on drilling the relief well.

Did he not think to ask Allen, Napolitano, or even the White House if Simmons claims were true or baseless?

Did he consider that Simmons is a financial analyst and may have an agenda in creating heightened hysteria surrounding the spill?

Did he consider the effect printing this claim could have on the people of the Gulf Coast?

Is it too much to ask to have the WaPo confirm or deny the claim?  Can they pick up the phone and call someone with a big official title and ask them if DHS does indeed have plans to evacuate the entire Gulf Coast?

Is there a local reporter out there who want's to bitch slap the WaPo?

There's magic in the air

I was on Bourbon Street last night, and I swear to Papa Legba, it was raining beer, whiskey and strange, multi-colored, plastic orbs fastened to strings!  I looked up to the heavens and saw a vision of Mother Mary's bosom in the sky, as if she was symbolically nurturing every one below.

On a side note, I didn't realize the Madonna had a tattoo of Axl Rose on her left knocker.

I heard someone shot a video of the miracle and it will be posted on the Huffington Post in short order with the following poll:

Do you believe a miracle happened on Bourbon Street last night?

-  I believe it was Medjugorje'ial magic!

- I am skeptical, but I'd like to see samples of the whiskey rain, and pictures of the boobies.

- What's up with Axl Rose anyway?  Is he back or what?

The unparalled journalistic ethos of the Huffington Post

Just so we know, this is the guy who posted the video claiming it was raining oil in River Ridge. The video that the Huffington Post then picked up and spread to readers nationwide, suggesting it was true.

I suppose it could have just rained oil on his street.

I'm going to go piss off my roof, film it and claim it's raining urine....I wonder if they'll post that.

She is Satan's Handmaiden

I now completely agree with Kevin Allman that Arriana Huffington is satan's handmaiden.


Raining Oil In Louisiana?

I am in River Ridge right now....it is not...in any way shape or form...raining oil.  Jim Bob may have a busted oil pan in his pick-up truck, but I can assure you it is not raining oil.

I tried to comment on this story three times to allay people's knee-jerk, chicken little, freak outs and the HuffPo editors censored all three of my comments....no profanity in any of them.  I guess they think it's funny to get people all freaked out and spread stupid rumors around the country that it's raining oil and toxic dispersant in New Orleans.  Thanks Huffington Post...you guys rock!  That does wonders for our tourism business. 

If I could get my hands on these guys I would wring their farking necks right now.

The Illusory Logic of Vitty Cent

Being a blog, I get signed up for every newsletter in the state regardless of my personal political disposition. I just got this newsletter from David Vitter's campaign and the opening statement is as follows:

It's been two months since the explosion aboard the Deepwater Horizon rig tragically claimed 11 lives and created a massive oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico, and millions of people in Louisiana and along the Gulf Coast continue to feel the effects of this ongoing disaster.

The response so far by the Obama administration has been a failure, but I'm continuing to fight for accountability, answers, and most importantly, action to save our coast and wetlands. I recently organized a meeting with U.S. Interior Secretary Ken Salazar to press him to overturn the drilling moratorium that's threatening to compound the economic damage of the spill, and I also visited areas in south Louisiana where large numbers of birds, fish, and other animals have been hurt by the spill.

Read below to find out how I'm fighting for you on these and other critical issues.

Now bear with me as I go off on a tangential spiral.

Being a fan of Carlos Castenada, I'd like to point out a concept he spoke of in his series of books. The premise of his books were written as factual (they mostly weren't) and in a psuedo-scientific manner in which he portayed himself as an anthropologist who came under the tutelage of a Toltec Brujo (sorcerer), Don Juan Mateus,  in the Sonora Desert of Mexico.  His books represent the alleged teachings of this wise man and have had a profound effect on promoting the "new age" movement over the past several decades.

I am not a "new age" fan, but I am a fan of Casteneda's and the philosophy of his books.

There was a particular passage where Don Juan and Carlos were having lunch at a diner in an obscure Mexican town; Don Juan introduced a polarized concept to Carlos called the "Tonal" and the "Nagual". It's really nothing more than a metaphor for cognitive dissonance, but the way Casteneda framed and embellished it was...well...magical.

Basically, the Tonal is everything that is "known", the Nagual is the unknown, unspoken, incomprehensible....the infinite.

Don Juan told Carlos to look at everything on the table, the salt and pepper shakers, the napkin holder, the plates, the food, the silverware, the table itself...everything you see in front of you and think you know....that is the Tonal. Then Carlos asked, "What is the Nagual?", Don Juan replied, "Everything else."

Ok, back to Vitty Cent.

Assuming Vitty Cent actually wrote this introduction, look at the opening sentence:

It's been two months since the explosion aboard the Deepwater Horizon rig tragically claimed 11 lives and created a massive oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico, and millions of people in Louisiana and along the Gulf Coast continue to feel the effects of this ongoing disaster.

Fo' true. All of this is Fo' true. Preach Vitty preach, it's a pain all Louisianians share. Now...take a moment...pause....feel nothing........

....ok....now read the first sentence in the following paragraph:

The response so far by the Obama administration has been a failure, but I'm continuing to fight for accountability, answers, and most importantly, action to save our coast and wetlands. I recently organized a meeting with U.S. Interior Secretary Ken Salazar to press him to overturn the drilling moratorium that's threatening to compound the economic damage of the spill, and I also visited areas in south Louisiana where large numbers of birds, fish, and other animals have been hurt by the spill. 

Try to recognize the Nagual between those two paragraphs. The huge amount of empty space between those two dissonant cognitive morsels.

The "unknown" between those two paragraphs is virtually infinite. The space in between those paragraphs would be a 4 course meal on Don Juan and Carlos' dinner table:

Appetizer: The more than cozy relationship between the EPA, LDEQ (Louisiana Dept. of Environmental Quality) and the Oil companies which Sen. Vitter has vigorously buttressed.

Soup/Salad: Vitter's cozy relationship with Andarko, their cash contributions, topped with his latest efforts to pass legislation limiting Oil and Gas company's liability to a $75 million dollar cap regardless of the billions of dollars in industry they destroy in our gulf waters or elsewhere.

Main Course: The massive amounts of cash David Vitter has received from oil and gas companies.

Dessert:  The connections and money Vitter has accepted from the Livingston Group....Livingston being Louisianan, Bob Livingston, another "infidel" who is currently the primary lobbyist for the country of Turkey and accused by former FBI translator and whistle blower, Sibel Edmonds, of treason for trading state secrets to the middle eastern country.

I would argue that all of the "unknown" and unspoken elements between those two paragraphs were largely responsible for the deaths of the 11 men on that rig.   That meal I just served you should be turning in your stomach.  I'm not necessarily a fan of Obama, but Vitter's kitchen was cooking up the recipes which resulted in those men's death well before Obama even put on an apron.

For Vitter to even remotely imply that Obama's response to this crisis of institutionalized, corporate greed is inadequate is the ultimate hypocrisy....or sorcery if you will.

The first paragraph in his mailer is easily digested by the masses. The second paragraph is shoved down your throat and you're not meant to taste it....just swallow.  Unfortunately most will.

In that respect, I actually admire Vitty Cent.  He is a magician of the highest order.

The Outrage will increase...

...in orders of magnitude now that the white, pristine beaches of the Redneck Riviera are being tarnished.  Pictures like these will start to weigh heavily on the blue collar workers who bring their families to the Florida panhandle every summer.

I just took the red pill

I need a drink.  Who's in?

Hey Wait a Minute

I thought liberals were the American apologists:



btw...$1,448,380 in campaign contributions from oil companies, Mr. Barton has received since he was elected to congress.  If we don't ask for the escrow account, do you think Barton will donate all that money he got to his constituents on the Texas coast?

And Vitty Cent has been deafeningly quiet on this one.  I wonder if that has anything to do with his BP bailout proposal and ties with the company who couldn't be bothered to send their reps to the congressional hearing yesterday, Anadarko.

The Lens has more:

Come to the Anadaroko side: We might have liability limits

Hah...we kicked your ass...thanks for the 5 million, can we have 75 million more?

I'm a little confused. BP gave the city 5 million for tourism advertising efforts in the wake of the oil spill. Here's the campaign we came up with:

The British press didn't get the joke:

New Orleans runs $5m anti-British campaign – paid for by BP

The advertising campaign is the brainchild of the New Orleans Convention and Visitors Bureau, which fears a sharp reduction in tourism and gatherings of other kinds, just as business was picking up after the devastation of Hurricane Katrina in 2005.

"You can't just say we're open, come," the bureau's president, Steve Perry, told the organisation as he launched the campaign, according to blogofneworleans.com. "You have to acknowledge it. It's sorta like the poster with the family in front of the shark tank at the aquarium after Katrina, saying we're pleased to report that this is the only part of New Orleans that's still under water."

I suspect the "brainchild" jab was wry British humor.

So as of today, the campaign is reportedly D.O.A.  But as luck would have it, Mr. Perry and our Mayor held a press conference this morning and asked BP for another 75 million dollars. 

I'm thinking maybe the ad campaign was an attempt to punk them into giving us more money.  Actually, I don't know what the hell to think.  It's dredging up really bad memories of our former mayor planning a fund raising trip to NYC in the wake of Katrina, then publicly commenting that the WTC site was still a big hole in the ground.

I doubt this campaign was even on Mayor Landrieu's radar before it was announced but let's hope the channels of communication get better in the immediate future.  Perhaps we should at least wait until we actually get the extra 75 million before we insult them.  I've been insulting the hell out of them but I never thought to ask for money to do it.  Now that I think about it, that's brilliant if it works.

UPDATE: 

New Orleans drops 'anti-British' ad campaign for fear of upsetting UK tourists

The bureau's president, Steve Perry, said the ads "were not anti-British at all" and blamed the Guardian coverage for forcing it to cancel any adverts "referring to anything British in every form".

"Already in our London office we've had multiple major cancellations because of the article," he said. "We've had to cancel the entire thing and we are moving to an ad that pokes fun at the president.

"We thought, with all the grief, we would try to turn things a little bit lighter and more tongue in cheek. So far, unfortunately, it has had devastating consequences that were not intended.

"The British are the most popular of all of the foreign visitors here. It's just horrifying to us."

So we're now going to take a jab at the president?  It's the Guardian's fault we created the ad?

Perry, who sounded despairing as he speculated on what he feared would be the political fallout over the campaign and the impact on a meeting with BP later in the day, said he could not understand how anyone in the UK could consider New Orleans anti-British when people there loved BP – a view not guaranteed to be a hit with Guardian readers.

We love BP?  Huh?  

Duct tape...the only thing that can fix this is duct tape. 

Well casing is gone?

So much mixture of speculation and information, it's hard to disseminate shit from shinola on this thing.

We're not shuttin' up this time, bitches

Sorry if we're being crude old chap...

...but you see, we're a tad bit overwhelmed with Crude right now.

 Israel's macho victimhood is foolish – but Obama's bigotry is despicable 

At least on the other side of the Atlantic the conduct of President Obama over the great oil spill is explicable, even if despicable. The whole might of American wealth and technology is displayed as utterly unable to deal with the disastrous spill – so what more natural than a crude, bigoted, xenophobic display of partisan political presidential petulance against a multinational company? 

Perhaps it would be a prudent, prescient, and poignant proclamation to remind his lordship that the United Kingdom is ultimately, and utterly, dependent upon "the might of American wealth and technology".  In fact,  Great Britain has proven itself quite impotent since the greatest generation of American might saved their hindquarters and lifted them off their knees against a dominant German juggernaut.

With that in mind, I agree with his lordship on this point:

It would be unwise to think that BP’s run of expensive accidents is just bad luck, or even individual manegerial failure. It may be that the strategy, while no doubt both New and Modern, is inherently dangerous, as the management is no longer in control of actions for which it has to take responsibility.

 Indeed, sire.  However, I suspect they are no longer in control of the actions of which they must take responsibility because they don't possess the "technology" or "might" to perform the tasks to which they aspire to prosper from.  Therefore, that responsibility lies with those who possess the ingenuity and intestinal fortitude to perform such services....services so critical to the security of not just the allegiance which binds our sovereign nations, but to the globe in full.

It is time that our American friends were reminded that they sang a different tune when the American company Union Carbide killed many thousands of Indians at Bhopal. Not to mention when the American company Occidental killed 167 people on a North Sea oil rig in 1988.

No sir, you need not remind us of Union Carbide's debacle in Bhopal.  But might I remind you that Union Carbide's core competency was the creation of the efficient development of energy sources such as propane, the production of petrochemical products such as the plastics which secure the world's food supply, and as luck would have it, Union Carbide was the former and sole operator of America's primary gaseous diffusion plant in the humble peasant village of Paducah, Kentucky...the author's hometown.  Interestingly enough, that plant produced a disproportionate majority of the enriched uranium in our country.  A technology which not only fuels power plants that are critical to increasing energy needs around the world, Union Carbide's enriched uranium was used to build the nuclear arsenal which propelled both of our countries to super power status in the wake of that little skirmish you had with the Germans.

You know....the conflict in which we rescued your lordship's little, resource starved island.

And by resource starved, I infer natural, mental, and military.  I do so hate to keep reminding you, but it seems your lordship is under the delusion that her majesty's kingdom is capable of standing on it's own two arthritic legs without the crutch of American might and technology.

And perhaps it is time that we remind you of the debacle the East India Trading Compnay left in India....or the one England left more recently in Iran. 

The sun never sets on the British Empire, indeed, but only because the United States suspends the sun in the sky over that little rock in the Atlantic you call home.

So I humbly beg his lordship's forgiveness for our bigotry and xenophobia....although I'm somewhat confused about that sentiment.  I didn't realize the British were, in fact, a separate race from Americans.

As for crude, I don't apologize....you see, we have a monopoly on Crude.  With that monopoly comes inherent risk and danger, which we have chosen to accept.  While your "multinational" has continually reaped the rewards of the risk and danger we endure, unfortunately, you must bear that responsibility with us.  Otherwise, I would suggest you set up a Paypal account on your blog in order to help pay your heating bill this winter.

Cheerio!

On our slow road to Hell

...this is one of the most ominous signposts we've seen yet:

P&J Oyster Co. to halt shucking due to Gulf oil spill

"I'm going to try and buy a few shucked oysters from some people in Alabama that are still processing oysters and once they stop, I'm done," said Al Sunseri, who along with his brother Sal has run the business that opened in 1876.

Sunseri isn't sure what will happen to P&J and its employees in the long haul. Other Louisiana oyster companies say their oyster supplies are also dwindling, prices are rising and the future of their business remains stark and uncertain.

Those words pierce my heart.

Yesterday, I had the misfortune of watching asswipe, Neil Cavuto, interview, no yell at,  U.S. Rep, Peter Welch (VT.)



Cavuto and Fox are worried about BP's future.  Cavuto and Fox are worried about how it will affect middle American's 401k plans.  Cavuto and Fox are worried about BP's dividends.  Cavuto and Fox are worried that we may offend BP and they will turn tail and dump the problem on American taxpayers.

Those words make me want to pierce Cavuto's head.

I'm not sure who's stumping for BP harder....Fox, Sen. Vitter, or Sen. Landrieu. 

Calling all engineers

I can't possibly decipher this scenario.  I'm just not qualified.  But I'd appreciate it if those of you who understand the physics of it could take a look.  Thanks. 

Sorry about the sideways view but I can send you a .pdf and you can rotate it if requested. Much love.

bpSpeculative

Stormy Seas?

Anonymous said... Dude, Dambala:

JP DID NOT POST ALL CONTRACTS.

JP did not post ANY professional services contracts.

Here's an example:

Look at this firm.

now look at their clients - yes some major JP contractors, but also:

Jefferson Parish Employees Federal Credit Union

+

Jefferson Financial Credit Union

Plus quite a few other credit unions (interesting client base).

http://www.lawyers.com/Louisiana/Kenner/DAquila,-Volk,-Mullins-and-Contreras,-A-Professional-Law-Corporation-593642-f.html

Look who's a lawyer there - why it's JP's former parish president and council chairman, formerly of the school board. etc. etc.:

http://www.nola.com/politics/index.ssf/2010/02/aaron_broussard_got_bulk_of_pr.html

Who runs Bartertown?

I was amused and somewhat surprised to see an ad for MWH on Nola.com's homepage this moring...here is the link:

http://www.theneworleanspicture.com/?utm_source=em_no_nola_website_ad_300x250&utm_medium=website_ad&utm_campaign=neworleans

As I've stated on this blog before, I do not question MWH's competency in the majority of the services they've provided for the city in the wake of Hurricane Katrina.  They were basically running our city government up until the final departure of the Naginites.  But here's the thing, our recovery from Katrina is over, we can't continue to sub our basic city services out to a private company, it's time to cut the umbilical cord and get back to running the show ourselves.

While MWH did perform herculean tasks in the wake of the storm, they have also sent us herculean bills.  Bills which we have yet to pay, mind you.

Remember when city experts we're trying to gauge how much money the city will owe when the Landrieu administration took over?  The estimate was like $20 million.  Well, I have it under good authority that the outstanding bill we have with MWH is in the neighborhood of $47 million.

Yikes.

So I'm somewhat bewildered to see this ad because I'm not quite sure to whom it's directed.  I would have to assume the new administration, but I'm having trouble believing that the new administration would continue to contract MWH, unless they are lobbying to continue to handle LRA/D-CDBG projects.  I'm certainly not opposed to that but my concern lies in our ability to separate MWH from standard city services which we need to be performing out of our annual operating budget (even though it's probably depleted or near depleted...thanks, Ray).

It's like separating Master from Blaster in Bartertown.  They ingrained themselves so deeply in our standard city services, we became crack addicts. We have to sober up and learn to run our own life now.

I'm not dissing MWH's performance, I'm just saying we can't afford to hire them to run our city, and we shouldn't have to do that in the first place.

If they're lobbying to continue to manage the LRA/D-CDBG projects, well that's cool, but we seriously need to separate them from our annual operating procedures.

Shiver me timbers

JP hoists the sails:

Jefferson Parish government salaries, contracts posted online

And OP one ups them:

Council increases transparency with subcontractor ordinance

Now combine those two notions and we're rockin' like Dokken.

Pirates Parlay

I'm about to do something really stupid (what's new right?).  I'm about to offer up some opinion and advice to our local politico's and public figures....for free.  Why?  Because it has occurred to me over the past couple of months just how ignorant our region's esteemed leaders are when it comes to handling "da blogs, da twitters, da Fakebooks, and da intertubes in general."  It dawned on me that there seems to be a fundamental disconnect between their perception of "new media" and the reality of new media.  Truth is, I kind of feel sorry for them and I think I may be able to help them avoid continually stepping in digital dog doo.  If they feel the information is useful, they are more than welcome to make a donation to the blog....you can pay me whatever you're paying your incompetent PR people :)

Here are 5 tips I humbly offer to add to your playbook:

1.  Fire your Media/PR consulting firm - Let's start there.  Case in point, Steve Theriot's recent botched salvo against Slabbed and the TP.  If your consultants stood by and let you proceed with a plan to use JP's taxpayer's dollars to sue the "John Doe" of the internet without begging you not to....you need new consultants.  If your consultants are sitting on their hands while you trample all over citizen's constitutional rights and set your parish up for a catastrophic lawsuit....you need new consultants.  If your consultants allow you to go into a debate and complain that people are videotaping you and that people who use the internet are dangerous.....you need new consultants.

Take a close look at your PR people/firm....is there anyone under 40 on the team?  Under 30?  Do they have an inherent understanding of the digital herd?  Are they tracking the discussions taking place online about you or your office...do they even know how to do that or what applications/software/services to use to do that?  Are they telling you the internet doesn't matter, just concentrate on TV and Print?  Are they telling you to ignore blogs, no one reads them and they have no credibility?  Are they telling you negative press doesn't matter unless it makes it on WWL or the TP?  Are they charging you an arm and a leg for pathetic astroturfing attempts?  If you recognize any of those points....you need new consultants.

2.  Engage the conversation - If you're not staying ahead of the digital herd, you will most likely get gored or even stampeded.  Ask yourself this question, "Why do blogs exist and why has their popularity increased over the past decade?"  The answer is really simple....because people have an intrinsic desire to communicate and share information.  Blogs, the internet, and mobile phones empowered communities with the ability to communicate in real time.  The flow of information has increased exponentially in the past decade and unfortunately the flow of misinformation has increased exponentially as well.  Like it or not, that is the reality and as a public figure you must be aware of that.

The one fatal mistake a public figure doesn't want to make in the digital world is to ignore it.  If you hold a public office or are running for one, YOU WILL BE DISCUSSED.  Whether it's a blog like this one, a forum on NOLA, or a simple tweet that pulls down 6000 views, the internet is like a digital version of proverbial water cooler gossip on a methamphetamine megaphone.  You simply can't ignore it and expect it to go away....ain't gonna happen.  The way to deal with this issue is to get ahead of the conversation....engage and inform.

I recently had an incredibly enlightening conversation with a former member of the Nagin administration.  Listening to that person's side of the story was amazing and informative, it helped me understand a lot of what happened in City Hall and even allowed me to sympathize with the challenges the administration and particularly this person was facing.  As I listened to the information, I asked the person, "Do you realize if you guys had just informed the public of this stuff you wouldn't have faced such a high level of scrutiny and discontent?  Why didn't you just let us know what was going on instead of stonewalling the public and the media?"  The answer was that it was an order from the top down to not communicate at all if possible.  That....is so very stupid.

Social media and new media is here and here to stay.  You can either engage it and use it to your advantage or you can ignore it or even hold it in contempt and face the consequences.  A blessing or a curse, it's up to you.  How do you engage it?  I'm not going to tell you because that's what you're supposed to be paying your PR/Media consultants the big bucks for.

3.  You are being watched - The exponential flow of information the internet provides also brings an exponential loss of privacy for public figures...especially when you are in public....especially when you are at a scheduled political appearance.  If you are in a debate or in a public event, ALWAYS assume you are being recorded.  So if you are saying one thing to one group of people and something different to another group of people you will most likely get busted.

As a matter of fact, in case you didn't know this little tidbit of information, Louisiana is very unique in that it is a "one party consent" state in regards to recordings.  That means that someone can record your conversation without informing you and that conversation is officially on the record.  In almost every other state you must inform the other party they are being recorded in order for the recording to be used, legally.

So when King Georges' paranoia kicked in, we got to watch him freak out on video...further exacerbating his previous insane display at the OPDEC forum.  Dangerous people indeed....nearly everyone around you has a camera in their pocket now and unlike the multimillion dollar cameras hanging on our telephone poles around the city...these cameras actually work.

4.  Never fight a gutterpunk - Even if you successfully land a punch on a gutterpunk all he will do is bleed on you and infect you.

If you are resorting to lawsuits to try and silence your online critics, you're going to look pathetic and desperate....and more importantly....guilty.  For those of you public figures who have never studied journalism law or read NYT v. Sullivan, let me break it down for you really quick.

First, you are a pubic figure.  You have "thrust yourself into the vortex of public opinion".  With that classification you have opened yourself up to a much higher level of scrutiny under the 1st amendment than a private figure.  Therefore, even if what is being written about you is emphatically false, it will be very difficult for you to land a successful libel suit against your accuser.  It's why publications like the National Enquirer and the Weekly World News even exist.

Second, you better hope you have nothing to hide if you do file suit.  If the case actually proceeds you will go into discovery and your life will be on display.  Even if you didn't commit the transgression you were accused of, there may be a witness brought to the stand who will spill the beans on another transgression.

Third, you must prove the accuser was publishing with malice.  If the accuser was merely asking questions as to whether or not you did or did not commit the transgression, you are going to have a hard time proving malice.  Once again you are a public figure and you are held to a much higher standard and level of exposure because you chose that life.

Bottom line....never sue.

If the accusation is false, engage it.  Publish the facts on an alternative site or even engage the source to set the record straight.   

If the accusation is true, definitely don't sue.  I would actually recommend doing the same thing if the accusations are false...publish alternative explanations on another site or engage the source yourself.  Of course you will need to lie like hell and hope for the best.

5.  Pay attention to the tide - I've never really liked the term "new media" but I use it anyway because it seems to provide a useful semantic construct for people to wrap their brains around.  But I think it's really a misnomer to describe IP driven media.

The television was the last true step in the creation of a "new form" of media.  We digest media through 3 senses, sight, sound, and touch if you can read braille.  The internet is not a new form of media, it's just a new way of packaging and delivering the electrons and photons...and most importantly it's interactive.  If you think about it, what online media has really become is an amalgamation of TV, Radio, and Print rolled into one experience...with interactivity to boot.  Sights (video/pix), Sounds (radio), and Words (print), the game hasn't really changed it's just the delivery is now faster, the experience is enhanced, and the public is now part of the conversation.  Until we invent scratch and sniff websites or an app that allows you to lick your iPhone and taste a food product...the basics of media creation and consumption is going to be the same as it ever was.

I pose that rant because I want to allay people's fears who may think terms like social media, new media, multimedia, etc. are too complicated for them to understand.  Don't worry about the evolution of the technology used to deliver internet media, just worry about the messages it's delivering in regards to your world.  You know how to watch a TV and operate a remote control, but you probably don't understand the mechanics or physics which are required to make TV a reality....same thing with the internet.  You don't need to know how it works, just where it's headed.

So don't fret the technology...that's the good news.   The bad news?  You have to pay attention and understand what the trends, turns and twists are for online media if you are going to navigate the waters successfully.  Or you need to hire someone to understand it for you.

For example, do you know what demographic constitutes over 60% of Facebook users?  Teenagers?  Not....try housewives.  Facebook has rapidly supplanted the soap opera as the focal point of attention for housewives nationwide.  I also read a report that Facebook was cited in one out of every 3 divorce cases in a predominant Florida county.

What importance does that have to a politician?  Well if I was running a political campaign and I knew the swing vote was housewives, like say a certain U.S. Senate race in our own state, I would damn sure want to leverage Facebook to reach that demographic.

Media waters are much deeper now and the risk and opportunity is much greater, but the basics of seamanship are still the same.  You have to pay attention to the tide and actively navigate your ship or you may end up being boarded by pirates or crashing into a reef.

There ya go.  If you choose to just continue to ignore the body internet or attempt to sue people in to silence...so be it.  Hope it works out for you.  At least my conscience is now clear, I've shared my views that there are better and more constructive ways to handle things.  Now back to the sloop to hoist the Jolly Roger.
     

Battling the misinformation

Many of you have probably heard about the loads of misinformation and attack campaigns circulating against our seafood industry....restaurants in NYC with signs that say "We do not serve Louisiana seafood", the Maryland crab industry actually putting out attack campaigns against the quality of our crabs, etc.

Here's a video I worked on to help combat that misinformation, please spread far and wide:

Hang 'em High

The criminal investigation is finally confirmed:

BP Criminal Investigation Launched by Feds

I must be psychic

...or psychotic.

James Cameron Working on Gulf Oil Spill Cleanup

I was joking when I put Cameron in that pic....turns out he may have answers after all.


And meanwhile poor Tony's lifestyle is being cramped by this little snafu he caused in our pond:



So sorry if we interfered with your afternoon tea, Mr. Hayward.  You just go back to your foxhunt and we'll clean up your mess.

If I catch that motherfucker I'm gonna drown him in his own oil.  I'm ready for the true second battle of New Orleans...we beat the Brit's ass once we can do it again.  I wish Andrew Jackson was alive today and president of the country, I suspect things would be handled quite differently.

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....hhhmmmmm...responsibility....

responsibility |riˌspänsəˈbilətē|

noun ( pl. -ties)

the state or fact of having a duty to deal with something or of having control over someone : women bear children and take responsibility for child care.

• the state or fact of being accountable or to blame for something : the group has claimed responsibility for a string of murders.

• the opportunity or ability to act independently and make decisions without authorization : we would expect individuals lower down the organization to take on more responsibility.

• (often responsibilities) a thing that one is required to do as part of a job, role, or legal obligation : he will take over the responsibilities of overseas director.

• [in sing. ] ( responsibility to/toward) a moral obligation to behave correctly toward or in respect of : individuals have a responsibility to control personal behavior.